Sunday, October 28, 2012


HAPPY BIRTHDAY MADDEN!!!  Can’t believe our baby is 4 years old!  Just doesn’t seem possible.   Madden is such a sweetie!  Yes, he is crazy and a handful but on the opposite spectrum of that he really is such a sweetheart.  One of my favorite things about him is he always calls me ‘honey’ and I love it.   Although there was a time when he use to tell most people in the family “I don’t like you” when he was mad, he is now the opposite with multiple times a day saying “you are my best friend” to most people in the family.  I am happy to be on the receiving end of that almost every day.  Just the other day his preschool teacher told me that he steals her heart.  He told her “teacher I use to cry when I came to preschool but I don’t anymore b/c I love you teacher”.  Isn’t that precious.  He is so loving.  Makes the difficult times a little easier to handle J

I have to say I feel very sad and guilty about Madden’s childhood, yes he is still a child but I am talking about when he was younger, pretty much his first year or two.   Our house was pretty crazy with 4 boys born within 3 years and when Madden was born Baker was only 13 months old and we were going through a lot with him.  Lots of hospital visits and stays and stress about figuring out what was wrong with him.  Having twins and a special needs child for siblings takes a lot of attention away from him and I feel really bad about that.  I can’t remember so many special moments in his life and that breaks my heart.    I think it is my fault that Madden was a bit of a challenge when he was younger; ok maybe still  a bit now but I figure most little kids are J I didn’t show him enough one on one, special attention and I was probably short with him at times b/c I was very stressed.  I am so sorry Madden.  You are a precious, sweet boy and you mean so much to me and your Daddy and your brothers.  Your older brothers treat you pretty much like you are the same age as them.  They are hard on you but they love you.  They are just making you into one tough cookie J  You are our best friend too and we love you so much and can’t wait to watch you grow up.